i have 3 kids my oldest is four in a few weeks my youngest is almost one the other is almost 3
they are 13 months apart
i still breast feed them
i pump for the oldest two they get the milk in sippy cups and the baby is on the breast she still feeds 12-15 times a day.
i am pregnant also and will nurse.
the problem is now my oldest wants to nurse more than at night before bed. i nurse them each to sleep. what do i do
do i let him nurse or not he tells me mommy i miss boobie milkie. he goes crazy if its in a cup,
everyone says hes to old to nurse still. i love the feeling of feeding them. but its quite demanding now that he wants to suckle5-6 times a day. i still nurse my 2 year old 3-5 times a day too. i have no plans to ween either
March 1st, 2010 at 8:35 am
damn! woman its time to stop!!! your kids would not starve to death!! they are old enough to eat other things and drink regular milk. you are doing a good job but… a 4 year old on breast milk? that is ridiculuos. and a 3 year old breat feeding every morning? every afternoon and every night? thats nuts!! call your pediatrician and ask him/her what benefits you are giving them by doing this and you will see that you are not doing any good for them.
March 1st, 2010 at 12:34 pm
only trolls like peeing in there pants
March 1st, 2010 at 2:29 pm
I think that you should stop with all of them…they are all old enough to be on regular milk. Although its may be good for them its a little strange to be breast feeding when they are that old.
March 1st, 2010 at 8:19 pm
K, there’s no way that nursing to this age is harming your kids, no worries there. Other cultures routinely nurse that long.
You are doing amazing to be nursing and pumping and providing milk to that many kids, your breasts are blessed my dear!
I pumped for my first until he was 18 months, his birth defects made even bottle feeding impossible, he was fed by tube. My second nursed until 18 months and weaned naturally herself.
My third nursed until about 27 months and I encouraged her to wean. It gets really painful for me to nurse while pregnant and I felt she was ready.
If it was me, and this is just my opinion, I would wean the oldest. By the time they are in school (pre-school? JK?) that just seems to be a threshold for moving into a more mature, independant stage of life. I think that by 4 years, she’s received the maximum in advantages from the breastmilk.
Nursing to sleep is such a trap, I found. They do need to learn some coping techniques in falling asleep on their own. I did it too though, and when I encouraged my 3rd to wean, I replaced it with stories and singing and she accepted it quite nicely and readily. I don’t think I will (nurse to sleep) with this next one though…although it’s hard not to fall into the trap!
I’d also consider starting to wean the almost 3 year old. By the time he’s three, that would be a good goal to have him weaned. (I’m using he’s and she’s at random, of course)
You just need to be careful that even though your body is managing right now, the new one could stretch you past your limit. Nursing 2 or 2-3 kids at once could be the maximum your body can handle, and still be delivering the nutrients each child needs. Remember that your milk will change with the arrival of the new one and the baby will need that early milk and it’s properties in a way that the older ones won’t.
Having said all that, wait till baby arrives and see how you’re handling it. Just don’t keep nursing for your own feelings though….that’s another trap. Analyze yourself carefully to be sure your emotional needs are being met by your partner. Our concerns should always be for what’s best for our kids. I’m sure you’re doing that anyway.
I’d contact La Leche League to get some good hard data, as your situation is quite unique. They are the golden standard for nursing, they do encourage multiple nursing, but they can also tell you if there is any risk to you or your kids.
All the best to you!
PS–And case in point, Splash, show me a kid who a)knows how long he nursed (even four year olds will forget it) and b)would tell others.
Having just read some of your added notes, they won’t starve, you would replace the nursings with something else like homo milk, or almond milk or some other snack. You won’t engorge if you do it nice and gradual. And I’m a little concerned about a one year old that only weighs 14 lbs and doesn’t take solids yet. I’m also big into letting kiddies show me they want the solids, but you’re facing some possible repercussions here by allowing no solids for THAT long. Your one year old’s digestive system NEEDS to mature, and her ability to eat something other then milk. My son was physically unable to eat through his mouth due to his birth defects and now at 7 years old, can’t speak. Now, this is drastic, and he has other issues as well, but the lack of stimulation from not eating normally for 3.5 years was one large factor. I also had a nutrutionist who followed my son and from a well educated, medical standpoint, insisted I start incorporating a special g-tube formula into his breast milk at one year because his body and brain quite simply needed the vitamins and nutrients.
If your doctor says that your one year old is healthy at 14 pounds, than…..I can’t argue with that, but that my dear, is a very small one year old.
March 1st, 2010 at 9:05 pm
Maybe, uh, it’s time to stop?
March 2nd, 2010 at 2:29 am
In my opinion extremely odd, but the milk is good for them!! I guess that is your prerogative!!
March 2nd, 2010 at 5:29 am
I am not sure how you have enough time in your day to nurse that much and pump. I only nursed for the first year and was glad my daughter transitioned to a cup so easily. I would have to stop nursing all of them especially being pregnant, but that is just me I know everyone is different I just could not handle that much.
March 2nd, 2010 at 5:40 am
It is high time to cut off everyone but the newborn-to-be. One year is plenty for any child and for any mother. Tell them all that nursing is for babies, not big kids–distinguish them from the youngest one; it will make them feel more grown up. You are doing this for yourself at this point, and frankly, it is very, very weird.
March 2nd, 2010 at 12:07 pm
It is not uncommon for older nursing toddlers/children to go through spurts of wanting more frequent nursings, especially when a younger sibling comes along. Most typical is for it to be just a phase that the older one will go through. Truthfully, I don’t know anyone personally who did more than tandem nursing with an infant and an older child nor do I know anyone with a child who wasn’t completely self-weaned by age 4. I have heard of older children being breast fed and I think if it is mutually agreeable between mom and child there isn’t anything wrong with it. I am mom to 4 children who were all breast fed as babies, the youngest 2 until they self-weaned. I only nursed one at a time and felt sometimes as though I had a baby attached to me 24/7, I can’t even begin to imagine that you do anything else besides breast feed a child or pump around the clock. You must burn 5000 calories a day just producing breast milk! You may want to reflect on how much of the nursings for all your children is related to comfort and consider helping them to transition to another comfort measure. Your older child’s desire to nurse more may be related to some stress he is going through as well and this is the only way he may know to relieve it. It doesn’t take much for a 4 year old to have worries. Something he heard or saw, thinking about another sibling joining the family, wondering where he is going to fit, a family member with an illness, or any other thing out of the ordinary is enough to send some preschoolers into a tail-spin. You have already made decisions concering nursing your children that go against what is considered the “norm” and this issue shouldn’t be any different. I say go with your gut and what you want to do regarding your oldest. If you don’t already belong to a breast feeding advocacy group, you may want to search online for one in your area or perhaps join an online discussion board for moms who nurse multiple children for extended periods. These are the people with the experience and advice you need. ETA What is your pediatrician saying about your almost 1 year old? Not having any solids by her age, while not unheard of, is quite unusual. What concerns me most is her seriously low weight. 14 pounds at 1 year old does not even register on the lowest end of the percentile chart. Unless she was a preemie and has some medical issues to overcome she should be about triple her birthweight. Your children will not starve if you wean them. Around 1 year old, most children are eating 3 meals plus 2-3 snacks per day. Breast milk is a perfect food for the first 6 months, but sometime between 6-12 months it ceases to provide all the vitamins and nutrients a child needs for optimal growth and development.
March 2nd, 2010 at 4:06 pm
A 4 year old is plenty old enough to set limits on. Whether he wants to nurse or have a sucker or watch TV, you are the mom and you get to decide yes or no.
I personally cannot imagine nursing all three to sleep at night. And I did have three nurselings at once also.
If you continue to nurse a child past infancy, that’s all well and good, but nursing a toddler or preschooler does not mean ‘on demand” at all! Just be firm and nurse only as often as you believe is reasonable.
So what if he goes crazy and has a fit? Kids throw fits when they don’t get what they want sometimes! IT’s our job as parents to stand firm to what we think is right.
March 2nd, 2010 at 4:13 pm
wow,,, good job!
i dont know how u do it, i stopped breastfeeding each time i got pregnant, im breastfeeding my youngest whos 16months, i did my others for two years,
i find im busy to feed one throughout the day,,, how do u do 3 and are pregnant??????????????????
if your finding the oldest to b demanding i think its time to wean, youve done good enough already,, he has to learn to drink other stuff besides boobie, lol
good luck to you xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
March 2nd, 2010 at 9:15 pm
I think you need to talk to a pediatrician or two and get their opinions. You could be harming your children. They need to learn to become independent. I’m not a doctor, not even close, but I am a mother of 4 children. I think they need to be read to at night instead of being breast feed at those ages.
March 3rd, 2010 at 2:35 am
I am not trying to make you feel uncomfortable. You need to stop nursing your older children. They need to become more independent. It is a wonderful thing to love your kids, and it is great that they are close to you. Do you know what kind of riticual they will get from others when they tell that they were nursed up to 4 years old and maybe older? They are going to be looked at as weird, and not as accepted by the ohter kids as easily. I think you are a very loving mother, and the world needs more mother’s like you. Please ask a professional therapist if what you are doing won’t somehow emotionally affect your kids. I hope this helps.